domestication: its a good thing

do you know what this is?  it's homemade ice cream.  made by ella and me.  in our home. 

first it was dishcloths.  then soap.  then butter.  now ice cream.  some of my friends, esp. my long-time friends (i'm talking to you, drew) are shaking their heads at all the domesticity.

there was a time, seemingly not that long ago, when making my own butter or growing my own food did not even cross my mind.  my world was huge then--it spanned practically the whole globe--and growing a garden was not only impractical for me but didn't make sense to my way of life.  after all, you can buy food--you can buy soap--you can buy just about anything and the people who make and sell these things are definitely grateful for your business.

besides, there's hardly any point in making pot holders if you don't cook.

but over time, my world shrank, bit by bit--at first it was limited to my own country, and then to my own city, and then a year ago this week my whole world was reduced to just this house--1200 square feet surrounded by a yard and a fence.

my commute to work now is from the kitchen to the dining room.  the only thing i have to pack before going is a cup of hot tea.

for a while i was a little concerned that i was not suddenly motivated to pursue all those projects that i had longed to take on when i was working outside the home--all those things that i always said i would do if, if, if.  i feared that i was becoming small, that my scope of interest was becoming narrow, that i was losing something of my identity even.

at the same time i was excited by all the new things that were calling me--i made menus and learned upholstery and started making our bread everyday. 

BUT WHY???

what coming home had done to my creativity was not clear to me until last night, when rudi made an offhand remark about the difference between designing rooms and designing cakes :D and then it all become crystal clear to me.

my scope of interest hadn't become narrow--it had become more focused, more distilled.  instead of looking outward in search of interesting things to make or do, i found them all around me, right in my own home and yard.  i started wearing and making aprons again--i recently started learning how to can and preserve fresh fruits and vegetables, i had a fresh salad from lettuce greens grown in my own back yard and i'm so looking forward to carving a pumpkin that i grew myself.

what i've learned is that there is a satisfaction and reward in the making of a home.  because of all this domesticity, this past year i've been able to do something i've never been able to do in my entire adult life:  i have opened my home, with pride, to a group of friends and their children on a weekly basis--have been able to offer them a safe, cozy, welcoming environment for learning and socializing--and i've been able to treat my family like the people they really are:  the most important people to ever cross the threshold of this home.

priorities.  i haz them.

Comments

[Heather]

Hear, hear! The career labeled "homemaker" totally belongs to each woman (occasionally man) to make of it what she will. It can be humdrum and routine, or you can be creator of beautiful things and wonderful meals, teacher and Mama to your littles, provider for your family, and more--then it is richly fulfilling.

[RoxieMeiske]

Yes, Lord. You spoke the truth. I love to see the 'younger' mothers talk and write like you. I am an older mother and grandmother and I feel the same way.

[Joy]

What a lovely post.

[Pumpkinbear]

Oh, dear--I'm a stay-at-home mom and I don't do ANY of those things!